LET IT GO FOREVER, NOT JUST BECAUSE IT'S THE HOLIDAY!

I had a family member call me for the holiday, to say, "We're still family". What happen to get us to this point was in the summer I had put up with all I could take with her gossip and negative talk about everybody she can think of. That's just not the company I keep.

I figured to myself, that if she talks about everybody else in the family to me, then she probably was talking about me to other members of the family. The "straw that broke the camel's back" was when I was experiencing some serious family issues. Instead of calling to pray with me or encourage me, she started talking about what she heard and wanted me to confirm if it was true.

I politely told her it's not to be discussed and hung up the phone. I haven't reached out to her since....but then, I received a call. Why? Christmas time brings out the best in people. At this point, I let it go, well never held a grudge, just didn't desire to be associated with gossipers. So, in other words, I told her I would come visit soon. Hopefully she's changed.

Do you have people in your family that just love to spread the family secrets around? What ever happened to family unity when "what happens behind closed doors, stays behind closed doors"?

BE GRATEFUL

*If your home alone, be grateful you're alive.

*Not able to be with your family, be grateful you have family.

*Don't have family, that's not true you wouldn't exist if family didn't create you.

*Didn't get the car you wanted, be grateful for that person who drives you around and especially your legs and feet that carries you to the car.

*Didn't get a gift, but you did and failed to realize, right NOW is the present; your heart beat is a gift you didn't have to ask for, but if you're here, you got it.

*Couldn't give a gift, life is the gift the keeps on giving. Your presence is a gift.

The little things we take for granted are really the BIG THINGS that mean the most and without them....breath, heartbeat.....we wouldn't be here to appreciate the SMALLER THINGS....."CHRISTMAS GIFTS".

PARENTS! KEEP YOUR WORD TO YOUR CHILDREN!

As parents we tend to take our children's feeling and emotions for granted just because they are "Our Children" and "they'll understand". That is so far from the truth. If we tell them we are going to do something, take them somewhere, buy them something with specific dates involved, you bet to believe, they won't forget. Better yet, they will be a constant reminder in your ear...most children are. For those who have children that say very little or may not be a nag, doesn't make your word/promise any less important.

Do your best not to break your word/promise unless it's an extreme emergency...that, they will deal better with than if you just "plain ol forgot" or changed your mind and nothing important is taking place of that which you promised. A child disappointed in you begins to lose faith and trust in you....then, who else can they trust?

Remember: Never tell your child to "do as I say not as I do". Instead, let your words be proven by your actions, and be the "Role Model" and "Example" they need in their life that they can model after. Make sure if you keep your word that your children also keep their word to you in following the standards that you set for them.

IMPORTANT: PARENTS! THIS MESSAGE APPLIES TO CHILDREN WHO ARE OBEDIENT AND DESERVING. Ex: If you plan to buy your child a car and he/she just crashed yours......STOP! THINK ABOUT IT!

Ex: If you plan to furnish your child's first apartment once they finish the college you paid for and they drop out.......STOP! THINK ABOUT IT!

The extra perks you give to your children should be conditional and done through positive reinforcement.

Relationships are build on selfLESSness not selfishness.

There are many women who feel they "have it going on".....they have their lives in order, but have a challenge in the area of "RELATIONSHIPS". After just listening to the conversation with many women, I see why they have a problem.....SELFISHNESS. They have a fantasy/false concept in their head of how the relationship should go on a day to day basis. They look through their own eyes at everything and that's a "BIG" mistake.

There is a saying, "Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus." This is so true. Men are very basic and we are so detailed with everything. We must realize that there is a mystery in two separate individuals becoming one in a committed relationship. The person who we know today is totally different tomorrow and we must reacquaint ourselves with this mysterious being.

Ladies, just think , we can be so loving one day and such a "b..ch", the next....that's the mystery of a women that men have to deal with. So, don't you think that he forever goes through changes within himself also. Let's put it this way, if you are lacking something in your relationship, give it....need more love-give more love; need more time-give more of your time or make yourself more available to him when he asks. As for money that's a different issue---If he has no money, he needs no honey.

There is so much to talk about, but this will do for now!

TOUGH LOVE!

When it comes to our children, many times we spoil them because we desire them to have more than we had growing up. I've learned that this can "paralyze" them in using their own actions to go out and work to make their dreams a reality when they get older.

Because we don't teach them that work is the key to productivity, they tend to depend on us for everything, even when they get grow up. Then our eyes are open to what we have created in them....and for me, I have to blame myself. BUT, there comes a time when the giving and helping them out everytime they call must stop and they have to make it on their own.

Tough love is letting go of our children, who are no longer children and allowing them to grow up, by learning what life has to offer on their own. Of course they will make mistakes, but all is a learning experience to do bigger and greater things. Trust the beauty of life to show them the way. They may be upset when you kick them out of the "nest", but will appreciate it in the end when they see they can be all they desire without your help.

Who's really down for you!

When everything in your life is going wonderful and everybody depends on you, You're the Best!
They come to with all kinds of challenges and what do you do, rescue some, give some advice on what to do, encourage or pray with others. For the most part you see them through to the end of whatever they are going through and make sure there is a victory report for them in the end.

But what happens to the one that everyone depends on, when they enter into challenging situations? What happens to most of the people they've lent a helping hand to. For some reason they seem to disappear or better yet, most of them have not the answer, so you are not able to confide in them. When your back is up against the wall, is their someone in your life who can stand between the wall and have your back? If not, the ones who are only with you during good times aren't really Down For You!

Sometimes, you have to encourage yourself. Sometimes you have to speak victory over your own storm. Don't wait for someone to rescue you, rescue yourself! It maybe one person you can depend on, but they may not always be there. So sometimes you can only depend on you to pull you out of the what seems like a "pit" situation.

Every obstacle is covering an opportunity. Every trial covers a triumph. So don't give up. Never be down, always get up or be getting up. Keep going until you see your breakthrough...BE the Miracle! Your miracle comes in your pursuit!